I said I was going to convince you not to make New Year’s Resolutions, but that wasn’t exactly it.
I wanted you to hang fire for a bit
and I invite you to consider some other things FIRST.
That was my polite way of saying you REALLY need to do this.
To get some nuts and bolts in place.
So when you do decide If/What/When you want to make changes – you don’t end up banging your head against a wall.
As I said, I want you to succeed – whether you end up signing up to our stuff one day or not (either way it makes me look good )
I’m going to present you with a series of questions over the next few days.
You might want to be very organised and write down the answers in the fancy journal you got for Christmas.
Or you might just want to have a little thinkipoo.
It all works.
It’s a series of steps over the next couple of weeks.
I think about 8 but I always underestimate these things so it may be 10.
If you do them all – your game will change.
On/Off
Succeed/Fail/Start again.
Things of the past.
How would that be?
Got to be worth a go…
Stage 1:
What’s REALLY going on Here?
Hello, welcome to the surgery what can I do for you today?
Well it’s nothing really… just this little rash, could be the washing powder?
I see, I see – yes I think you’re right, I’ll write you this prescription,, change your washing powder and that should clear up nicely.
Lovely thank you.
Is there anything else I can help you with.
No, no, that’s fine, thank you, doctor.
OK bye.
Thank you Goodbye.
*Patient opens door.
*Stops.
*Turns.
Ermm… Doctor – there was this ONE other thing ….
^^^^^^^^^^
That stuff.
That’s the stuff.
The other thing, that you didn’t come in for, but is the main reason you did.
So BEFORE we start working out ‘THE THING’ you plan to change in your life, that thing you ARE or AREN’T doing.
(pssst – I don’t need to know what that is, but you do –
can be ANYTHING you would normally make a resolution to change)
I want you to have an out of body experience.
Zoom out – so you can see yourself on a big screen.
And well what are the chances – today’s feature is a documentary about your life.
Get yourself a cushion, a blanket and a nice cup of tea/coffee.
Dim the lights.
OK now watch – you’ve just tuned in at a time EXACTLY as you are about to do/not do THE THING.
– Really observe what’s happening to that character (YOU).
– What kind of scene is it?
– How are you feeling JUST before?
– How does it make you feel while the situation is happening?
– What about afterwards – how are you left feeling?
– Does it affect anyone else?
Can you think of another time, and ask yourself the same questions?
Maybe one last try at another time/place/situation.
Watch it a few times.
We have a saying that ‘the issue is never the issue’ and it’s practically always true.
We’re looking for your SECONDARY GAIN
Some people I’ve worked with in hypnosis tell me that:
“Cigarettes make them feel calm.”
When we delve further…
stepping away from noisy children into the garden,
taking a deep breath of fresh air –
a change of scene,
a chance to think –
is what was REALLY making the difference – the cigarettes weren’t it.
“They’re spending countless hours attached to the phone.”
What could that be covering up?
The dopamine hits are powerful, but what else?
Is there something in the real world that needs addressing?
Something you need to sort out, but it’s easier to plant your face in a screen.
“They literally can’t get up for morning exercise”
Is there fear of failure?
Is there not enough room?
Not sure what to do?
Staying up too late so that there is sufficient ‘grown up time’… then can’t get up
Slightly too regular Vino Colapso, so head thumps a bit?
– What is REALLY going on?
– What are you actually GETTING OUT OF the situation you don’t want to be in any more.
– Be a detective.
– Be detached.
– Be objective.
– Be forensic.
– Be kind
There is no blame.
There is only truth.
That’s the sh^t we can work with.
However mundane, obvious, weird, dramatic or otherwise it is.
Think from outside the situation.
If that person on the screen wasn’t you,
but someone you loved very much –
how would you break the news about the REAL TRUTH behind what’s going on?
What are you actually getting out of the thing that you so don’t want to be doing/or NOT doing the thing you wish you did?
What’s the payoff.
What’s in it for you?
Give it some thought.
And we’ll move forward from here next time.
If you want to share and brainstorm it – find this post in Wise & Gorgeous: Inner Circle ™ and comment below –
everyone’s nice and they’ll be happy to help,
but otherwise have a really good think.
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