If at first, you don’t ‘suck seed’…
(I made Buddhist pun …*nods sagely*)
A Buddhist Teaching: Look at an apple tree.
There might be five hundred apples on the tree,
and each apple has ten seeds.
That’s a lot of seeds.
We might ask,
“Why would you need so many seeds to grow just a few more apple trees?”
Nature has something to teach us here.
“Not all seeds grow. In life, most seeds never grow.
So if you really want to make something happen, you had better try more than once.”
You’ll remind your child ten times to say thank you before they do it without prompting.
You apply for 20 jobs to get one interview.
You’ll attend 20 interviews to get one job.
You’ll interview 40 people to find one decent employee.
You’ll talk to 50 people to sell one house, one car, one vacuum cleaner, one insurance policy, or a business idea.
And you might meet a hundred acquaintances just to find one best friend.
When we understand the “Law of the Seed”, we don’t get so disappointed.
We stop feeling like victims.
We learn how to deal with things that happen to us – just as they are.
Laws of nature are not things to take personally.
We just need to understand them – and work with them.
IN A NUTSHELL:
(Or my favourite German word: Kurzgesagt.
Say it. It’s fun. Great Scrabble score, too. Might be just me.)
Successful people are people who were bold enough to fail more often.
They plant more seeds.
I am not a fan of the word: should. But I’m going to fire loads at you and get them all out of the way at once.
If you want to be happy – you should not decide how you think the world SHOULD be.
You should not make rules for how everyone SHOULD behave.
Many times, such thoughts can bring you spiraling down into more unhappiness.
If you expect that:
- Friends SHOULD return favours.
- People SHOULD appreciate you.
- Planes SHOULD arrive on time.
- Everyone SHOULD be honest.
- Your friend SHOULD remember your birthday.
These expectations may sound reasonable. But often, these things won’t happen.
So you end up frustrated and disappointed.
There’s a better strategy.
Demand less, and instead, have preferences.
For things that are beyond your control, tell yourself:
“I WOULD PREFER “A”, BUT IF “B” HAPPENS, IT’S OK TOO.”
If you have some control over the situation – decide whether you want to change it – or just to mentally put your middle finger up and move on.
You prefer that people are polite.. but when they are rude, it doesn’t ruin your day.
You prefer that your boss isn’t a dick… but rather than wallowing in the unfairness of that – you take positive steps to deal with it – or ignore it.
Whatever your challenges this coming week, keep on keeping on.
Challenge yourself to be resilient, patient, insistent, calm and philosophical.
Change what you can – ignore what you can’t.
Chalk disappointments and ‘failures’ up as necessary stepping stones on the path to achievement and success.
You are doing important work – and there are people in this world that love you more than you can imagine.
You should hold that thought.
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