Those of you that have been used to our daily email rants
will have noticed; the rants have got a bit thin on the ground.
This wasn’t on purpose
Every day we INTENDED to write to you
But every day is ending up with the pair of us crashed out
at an entirely inadvisable hour in our respective houses…
with not quite everything done.
It’s not a moan.
We are lucky to be able to do what we do,
but since the first ladies started in The Project…
it’s been like the real World has got a bit incidental.
It won’t always be like this.
We’ve been re-crafting, rewriting and re-filming
the third month –
as running the thing has shown us how we can do it even better.
And things we wanted to add, that would help.
At the same time as looking after everyone
and making sure they keep on track.
Which seemed entirely doable on paper.
We won’t lie.
They have usually been full on 14 hour+ days.
(it doesn’t help that Tanya insists on making all the music
from scratch, editing, audio-mixing and
and green screening goodness knows what else
…all the films herself…
or that Claire gives long individual coaching answers to
each and every person, to help them overcome whatever
difficulties they are having)
We’re not sure what’s going on in the news
Lost track of who’s number 1 in the charts.
What we ARE sure of
is what is going on, in the lives of the 3 groups of ladies
that are taking this journey with us.
What their shopping lists are this week
How many times they have exercised
Photos of how they have decluttered their homes.
Chats in real time with people sitting, anxious in their car
before dental appointments that they’ve been
putting off for over a decade.
“Being able to talk to you both like this feels so liberating,
I could never be this honest with people face-to-face.
You’ve helped me make sense of so much”
Wrote a woman this morning.
People doing The Project have been drastically changing their diets, their bodies,
their homes, the way they approach their low mood issues… their relationships
…their goals, in one case, their career – Some since May 1st,
and some are getting weary.
It’s the end of the school year.
The children are absolutely knackered.
Teachers are beyond knackered.
And parents are arguably the most knackered of all.
July feels like swimming through treacle.
Can feel it from everyone.
It’s tangible.
When you are tired – mentally, physically
Your mind is telling you that the easiest thing would be to just give up.
Sod it.
Can’t do it.
I saw this and sat down to write an encouraging email,
full of useful advice that will make everything easier
and you less tired
and actually able to deal with it better.
And I will write that
But not today
BBC news was in the background
and there was a woman being interviewed that had brought her family here
from a country where she would certainly be raped or killed if she stayed.
She got here via a Hollywood film-worthy difficult journey. It took her 7 months.
Was scared, hungry, tired, exhausted, treated like a criminal,
separated from her children.
Fought to get them back.
Did things to get money that she never imagined she would.
She used to be an accountant in her country.
And here – five years later she is talking about the business she has built
here from literally NOTHING.
..the G.C.S.Es her lovely eldest daughter had just sat
and her little ones happily playing in the background
(after all arriving in England with not one word of English)
The interviewer asked her: all that time – ‘did you ever think of giving up?’
Woman: Giving up? How could I do that? I would suffer more if I gave up
than the horrors of the journey to get here.
Interviewer: Were you starting to run out of energy?
Woman: Haha – I ran out of energy at the start.
If it is important enough…you find energy from somewhere!!
And that’s the key.
If you are escaping a terrible life for your family
then you will find the energy to keep going.
If you’re getting chased by a man with a gun
you find you can run pretty bloody quickly.
If you are hanging on to a cliff edge with even a bit
of a grip – you have to damn well pull yourself up if you can
….given the other option.
But sorting your life out.
Hmmm.
When everything gets too much;
you hate the way your naked body looks in the mirror
Worrying becomes paralysing
Work seems unachievable
Family life too hectic to think
Sitting on the settee with a tub of Ben & Jerry’s feeling like
the Worlds biggest f&^k-up.
And you are SO CERTAIN you want to change all that.
In that moment.
It’s not about what you do the next day
It’s whether you are still doing it in ten weeks
And six months
And a year.
One of our groups will be setting some goals this week
and breaking those down into do-able tasks.
And writing them in their Workbooks
Some of the questions they will be answering for us, are:
Do I actually REALLY want to do this?
Am I being true to myself even trying?
Is it realistic?
Is there another way?
and other more soul searching questions
which essentially find out whether;
The pain of staying as they are
is greater than the pain
of committing to change.
Your thing
The thing that you know you will DEFINITELY want to change. Your Body
Your Anxiety
Your Low Mood
Whatever it is.
If it has NOT got to the point where putting in 20 minutes a day
of effort… even when that effort is simply opening an email
or listening to a 3 minute recording.
Even though you found time to spend 2 hours plus on Facebook.
Is too much to ask.
Well if it’s not – there really is no point, in doing The Project
or even trying to do it on your own….as you will fail.
Three ladies have got almost to the end of their 6th Month
and only just realised… they are only just in that place.
And have decided to do the whole thing again.
Not because they have failed.
But the process has, relentlessly, and kindly, taken them to a place
where they know they are ready to really begin.
And yet others…
Oh My Goodness
I can’t wait to tell you what they have achieved.
and as for YOU…
You are racing to get to the end of term when
everything will be so much easier.
Except it won’t.
Because the childcare juggling, and trashed house,
and outings and noise.
The ‘Mum, I’m bored – and can we go swimming’
And “I need a lift” and “can Emma come over”
Can you find a few minutes now
to shut your eyes and just breathe for a few minutes.
To take a breath and refocus.
And if in the dark space behind your eyes, and the pause between
the in and the out breath.
You can calm your mind enough to think, and imagine.
And you realise that the pain of staying where you are,
in the war-torn country of your life,
is more pain than the journey to get somewhere better.
And you want us to help.
The Project runs a couple of time a year – and we’d love to have you
But only if you are in that place.
There is a link below to find out more…
We don’t normally do this
But here’s a meditation you can do now.
It’s only online for 24 hours.