The Gym
I don’t mind the gym, I won’t lie.
I mean I’m not a weirdo
I don’t LOVE it.
But I know what I’m doing
so it’s not an unpleasant experience for me.
The way we know it is for
most people.
Even given that I quite like it and I know where to go to be away from
1) the sweaty meat-heads
that are looking at themselves in the mirror and trying to pick up women,
and
2) the tiny little skinny bottomed 20 something girls on the bikes,
with their Closer magazines and full face of make-up!
(And both of the above pretending not to
check each other out..)
I’m armed with my anti-bac spray in an effort not to catch some grot from all those bodily fluids that I haven’t asked to inhale/ingest/imbibe…
There is still no point.
And notwithstanding the fact that I know proper technique so I am unlikely to get those pitying glances from the gym bunnies….
that I see them shoot at any poor soul trying to make sense of the unfathomable diagrams…
Or worst still, the well-meaning ‘helpful’ gym know-it-all – who wanders round dispensing advice.
to people who just wish they would bugger off.
(like the bloke at the pub that hangs around by the fruit machines…)
Because I know what will happen.
And there’s no point.
What you pay for at the gym is Intentions.
You pay for Resolutions
You pay for Hope.
You THINK you are paying for the equipment and the specialist help, support
and all those things they offer you on January 2nd when you join up.
***READ THIS – IT’S IMPORTANT***
If everyone used the gym the way they truly intended to in January, throughout the year
you would never get a seat on a spin bike or a space in a class.
They KNOW you won’t either. And they don’t care.
In fact they don’t want you to
as they would have a reception full of people complaining all year round,
They deliberately oversubscribe gyms ten fold.
Because they know what people do.
ALL OF US DO
We go – in earnest as much as we can in January and a bit in February and occasionally in March
possibly another little spurt in July
and by the time the Summer Holidays are here, it’s all fizzled out.
INTENTIONS do not make you lose weight and tone up.
EQUIPMENT does not get you into shape.
In fact you don’t need equipment.
Any of of it.
RANT INTERLUDE:
When I (Tanya) was 18 I got a student job at a toning table salon.
When I did the training, we were told to measure people ‘a little bigger than they were’ and then 10 weeks on, we were told to pull that measuring tape as tight as possible.
Knock a little bit off.
“But that’s Lying??”
“Well, that’s the fitness industry for you love”
I didn’t stay there very long.
They didn’t care about their customers either. They only cared about swiping more credit cards.
Like the gym January Memberships office.
I know – I’ve worked in one of those too.
Years ago.
I know their tactics.
Don’t like them one little bit.
Also, toning tables are stupid.
Anyway
THIS is why I don’t go to the gym:
I would choose the machines I like.
And think I am working hard… but in truth I probably could do a little more, or lift a little more,
but I’m already sweating, right?
And if I go with a friend, we’ll just chat and muck about a bit, and go to the cafe afterwards..
It’s fun.
But it’s tinkering round the edges.
I need to be accountable.
I need an Instructor or trainer to make be
do TWO MORE!
I need to know I’ve booked the session or the coaching call
(love live online coaching – SO time-efficient) and if I decide that the Strictly Final is on or it’s disgustingly cold I won’t find an excuse.
But if I wasn’t accountable I would.
I KNOW what I need to do,
but on my own…I will never push myself.
Not in quite the same way.
(And I get kick-ass new ideas from another trainer as he does from me)
I won’t lie…I don’t particularly enjoy burpees.
If anyone tells you they do – they are either a liar or into some really kinky 50 shades stuff.
That’s why we get it.
Many fitness people are telling you lies.
Whoo – #gymmode #legday #gohardorgohome
“Broccoli and burpees brigade??”
Do shhh.
Do me a favour.
We all know what we have to do but we all need a bit of a kick up the bum to do it.
Not just exercise – but eating well too.
The people on The Project do it for the kick up the bum.
Best of both Worlds.
Do things from home But know that someone is checking that you do.
(If it was easy to do it by yourself… those Davina DVDs would have seen a lot more daylight..)
If Davina asked you to send a selfie of yourself after you’d done the workout… and congratulated you personally every week when you did.
It would help get the job done.
So if you want to be accountable to us
And you want to change something.
Or you want to change everything.
And you are fed up of feeling so fed up and tired
We are reopening soon.
You’ve heard from the women who did change everything,
The ones who were so worried about their weight
and health…that they might not see their children grow up.
The ones who lay awake at night worrying what people thought of them, and that their husband might find someone with a better body.
The ones that were actually disgusted by themselves and how they had got so unhealthy and overweight.
The one’s whose low mood busy lives and anxiety – used to sabotage their great resolutions.
You’ve heard their stories and you know what extraordinary changes they made.
How they turned their lives around.
How they changed everything.
You already know what to do
Like me in the gym.
You just need someone to make sure you do it.
If you want us to help you do it.
Register Your Interest HERE
xxx
p.s. Richard Branson has business Mentors –
all successful people have other people that coach them.
It’s not a sign of laziness…
it’s just a very shrewd move.