Dilated Pupils
Mouth Watering
Heart Racing
I. Just. Want. It.. NOW
This is how Ellie described to me what happened when her husband came back from the Co-Op
Not JUST with the bin bags he went for but with a family size bag of Walkers crisps before he left for Monday night football practice. She hadn’t planned to eat that kind of thing. In fact she had started a new eating plan.
Her husband knew, she’d made wall charts and been to Holland & Barratt.
It was all going really well.
But that day, it had all gone on. Hellish Traffic Jam – so she was late for nursery drop-off.
Rather patronising nursery manager woman had wanted to talk about a biting ‘incident’ that had happened at lunchtime.Say sorry to Harvey, Chloe… right can we just go home?
Apparently it required further psychological delving. Chloe is just 2. Harvey looked tasty.
I just want to go home….
Then Ellie’s mum had called and to tell her that her least favourite relative
(a snobby, skinny, attention-seeking 25 year old) would be joining them for Christmas.
And she knew she was unlikely to get through the workload she’d been given and therefore in line for a ‘performance review’ next Monday. And there was the bag of Walkers.
Ellie used to have a bag of walkers EVERY lunchtime. When she stopped off for petrol too. When she got in from work.
She joked that she was in a sexual relationship with Gary Lineker – because she puts his stuff in her mouth so much.
Absolute Filth.
She’s a funny lady.
So Kids’ tea done, grown up dinner in the oven baths, stories and two children in bed then flopped on the sofa.
‘Strictly’ on the iPlayer. ..a bit of Aljaz
Lovely!
Aaaaaaaaannnnnnnd relax.
MUUUUUMMMMMM!!!!!! Chloe’s wee-ed the bed!
Chloe has just gone into the big bed and refuses to wear nappies at night because she is a “BID GERL”
Sheets, bath, washing machine, tumble dryer (how the hell did she get in on the pillow as well)
45 minutes later Chloe is finally asleep big sisters lights are out and flop 2.0 on the sofa.
RING RING (this better be good)
“Hello darling, I am going to join the boys for a swift half and possibly something to eat after football coz it is Steve’s last day…. Don’t worry about me for food”
OUCH
That bag of Walkers didn’t even touch the sides.
But why Emotional Eating?
Emotional eating: the practice of consuming large quantities of food – usually “comfort” or junk foods —
in response to feelings instead of hunger.
Experts estimate that 75% of overeating is caused by unresolved emotions.
I appreciate that sounded unscientific. I can do the science, please email but it would only make this email boring
There are five MAIN triggers for people to eat the junk food they know they don’t really want to eat. (But can’t stop themselves)
1. Getting Hungry.
Ellie’s day had overrun. She worked through lunch as she had so many deadlines to meet. Traffic made her late, the nursery made her later
The piddled on bed made it later still
And then dear husband had made damn sure she wasn’t going to lay the table and do some rice and a salad to go with the casserole.
When she put those family sized, sexy, bloody Prawn Cocktails in her mouth it was close to 8:30pm – and she hadn’t eaten anything meaningful since 8am.
Same as the Magnum and half a bottle of wine that washed them down.
Her body was saying
“GIVE ME THE HIGHEST CALORIFIC, FATTIEST QUICKEST FOOD NOW or so help me God, I am going to collapse on you.”
2. The ‘Feck It Factor’
Stuffing your face with cake, or burgers, or fizzy drinks – can be a way of punishing yourself.
I am SO FAT, such a failure, so disgusting and pointless and worthless, I am going to eat this – to PROVE IT.
Look how revolting and ill-disciplined and lazy I am body take THIS. Why would I give a body like this healthy food?
I don’t deserve it.
Yes I want to Supersize that and Yes I will have a chocolate muffin with my cappuccino.
FECK IT
3. Soothing Yourself.
Our brains release OPIOIDS when we eat sugary and fatty food. This TEMPORARILY makes us feel all calm and soothed.
Opioids are the active ingredients in Cocaine and Heroin
This is why we use this kind of food to TREAT ourselves. To celebrate. As a naughty but nice indulgence.
Your subconscious mind REMEMBERS how you feel after eating that stuff. And makes you want more.
Ellie’s brain could hear those crisps calling to her from the kitchen. As her stomach was rumbling, and she was getting more and more exhausted. This ingrained pattern is as tough to crack as a drug addiction.
4. Can’t Face the Truth
Put a brave face on. Look like the perfect mum/wife Stiff upper lip.
If things have gone to sh&t (which they will at some point, what with being a human and so on) Something has to give.
You can sit and explore your feelings and take practical steps to improve your life.
Or far easier – to get that feel-good factor is to dive head first into a tub of Haagen Daazs.
Ellie was actually pretty pi^sed off that her husbandhad let her rush around getting a nice meal ready. And replaying her day, there was actually NOTHING that she had enjoyed.
She was bored, deflated, worried and knackered and now she was annoyed as well. It was the last straw. She was going to feel better. But only for a little while.
5. Mindlessness
Picking at your dinner after you’ve finished. Going back to the buffet over and over… Chunk of cheese on the way past the fridge.
Sitting in front of the TV and not noticing a whole Galaxy disappear. Not being conscious of what you eat, is Mindless eating.
We do it all the time.
There was a good array of revelations last month when people took up the challenge of photographing EVERY single thing that passed their lips for 7 days.
Every single one of them were SHOCKED at what they actually ate – and how that added up.
AND THEN
They started to stop and think. I don’t want THAT photo on my phone. Am I actually hungry? Do I need that? Will I be glad I ate that?
It wasn’t a diet plan telling them what to eat. It was they themselves, overriding that unconscious reflexand actively making conscious choices.
Quote from the group: (re: me and Claire) “Damn you!!! This can’t be undone!!!! I don’t want to let myself down now , you pair of witches”
MWAH HAHAHAHAAaaaaaaa
Quality.
4 + 5 Is what Wise & Gorgeous are MOST interested in. Because sorting out 4 + 5 is what sorts out 1-3.
Mindfulness teaches you to know how you feel. To give it a name. Context. Define it. and to know what you are doing. This moment.To decide and to choose and to taste and savour
and know when to STOP.
This stuff can be learned. Have you got a raisin? And a few minutes? GO and get one – and come back and listen to this.
Learn how to eat..
Arrogant much?
Probably…
Mindfulness is woven through and underpins our online coaching programme
Supporting women to transform their, Mind, Mood, Body and Food
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