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I don’t believe in astrology.
But I seem to be a typical Libran. (which is obviously a coincidence)
Decisions….
Not my strong point.
I’ve been reading and listening to what much cleverer people than me
think about decisions.
Will we book cinema or bowling?
What time shall I set the alarm?
Shall I get the Tuna Salad… or the Steak in Ale Pie?
Easy.
This or that – One or the other.
That’s what you do all day long; every day is built of little decisions based on what went before.
Or what you know already.
Those decisions are kind of easy, and comforting and you can feel all very clever by effortlessly, smoothly – choosing this shiny path of ease…
Then WHOOSH. Hit on the side of the head by an off-side HARD DECISION missile.
Suddenly – NOTHING is comforting, the data doesn’t apply – 404 Page not found.
What’s best – Early night or night out? Home improvements or holiday?
Or
Admit defeat or give it one last shot? Live for the moment? Or plan ahead?
Try…or don’t?
What makes a hard decision hard is that there’s no clear winner…
I was 10 years old and weighing up the pros and cons of moving to London.
Being rather optimistically convinced of the degree of influence I had on events…
(I have managed to keep that one up)
And I wrote a long list of pros and another of cons, and they evened up about the same.
But then I stumbled on the game changer ‘Pro’
“I might meet famous people on The Tube”
Fact is: once I realised that one – I found another 15 Pros.
The pros won.
And truth is…I did see famous people from time to time and one was even on the Tube.
I wanted to be the sort of person that met famous people on the Tube.
And then I acted accordingly.
Noticing when the Eastenders cast were doing a Charity Event – and getting myself along.
Or catching the tube to Covent Garden and hanging about outside Pineapple…in case I saw a boy band.
Which I did. Even did a class with one.
Self-fulfilling prophecy.
I made myself into the sort of little girl that would see famous people on the Tube.
(even spoke to a few)
And the decision wasn’t a lucky one. It was the act of making the decision that made it happen.
It wasn’t external events making it happen it was me.
I became a person that lived up to my decision.
It is the space between getting the question realising there was no obvious answer….
Like the freeze-frame moment, the coin is in the air…
Is where you find the important stuff out.
Here’s what happens:
You catch sight of yourself in the mirror and it doesn’t look ‘how you want’.
You go upstairs…and your thighs hurt “wow – I am knackered climbing the stairs”
You find pictures…you looked so much better.
How did you get like this.
You are aware of your clothes ALL DAY where they are tight..
And you don’t like it.
Feel a bit disgusting, actually. And unattractive and a bit cross.
And THEN You go on a diet and start running and it all is so positive and a bit exciting and this regime is going to be the one that fixes it and the answer to your prayers..
and the first week is great and some of the second
and if you are exercising – you are aching like nothing on Earth.
(There must be something wrong with you – how can it ache this much?)
And that is where the REAL decision is made.
That is the time that lots of people give up.
Humans default to the easy option The same. The what we usually do
That is the time, that the lack of what we usually eat and the time we usually get up, and the effort we usually have to go to physically…
Kicks in BIG style.
That’s much harder than the initial decision. That one was easy. Do I want to look and feel better.
Der.
Yeah.
Now, though… you have found that you are presented with a whole new set of decisions to make.
You now KNOW what you are going to have to do.
Do you choose…
Effort or relaxation
Relaxing or setting an alarm
Indulging or having self control
Aching legs or not
And those decisions keep coming.. RELENTLESS
It was supposed to be easy now.
Well it might be.
Depends what happened when your head was in that decision space.
Did you decide:
“I want to be the sort of person that feels PROUD of myself.
The way I did this.
The one who isn’t aware of her clothes
or her tummy when she’s sitting down.
The one who feels confident, and can run up the stairs”
Is that the sort of decision you made?
If it is – no worries. You’ll do it. Takes a few months, you’ll get there and you will probably end up training as a fitness instructor
or taking up some fabulous new hobby…. A new job – partner – the sky’s the limit…
But if it was “I am so fat – I need to do something”
Save yourself the effort, love… it’s just not going to happen.
You’re not ready – no point wasting your time.
Anyway back to what happens.
You realise who you want to be.
You find more reasons why that should be
You decide.
You start a new life.
At that point things are at their hardest
some people think they made the wrong choice
they panic
they go back to the way they were
they blame the diet, or the class, or the whatever it was.
And you get the ‘fall at the first hurdlers’
Bye bye.
Some come back.
Some don’t.
But the rest.
The REST
The rest are the ones that have taken the decision
in that space between the question and the answer
And decided who they were going to be.
And if you do that – you can’t be beaten.
It WILL work.
It can’t NOT.
Sorry – back to what normally happens with people that get themselves from out of shape to loving their body.
People decide
They give themselves more reasons why they’re right.
They do
They stumble (sometimes)
They get back on it.
They do
They DO
THEY DO
Every day…THEY DO
And then it gets easier
You build a little muscle
Which burns calories (even while they sleep)
and you get stronger
and can do the exercises better
and you find themselves preferring vibrant healthy food
and feeling EMPOWERED not deprived,
every time you make a healthy decision
And stronger.
PROPERLY STRONGER.
In your mind and body and decisions – and WORTH.
And then you find can throw themselves into it more… And dig deeper and pretty soon, you can’t believe how hard it was at the start
The hardest bit
But now.
You don’t ache,
You don’t feel deprived,
Your clothes feel nice
You feel lighter
You move about the World more effortlessly
And then it gets easier
And you get better
And it is like this unstoppable snowball building momentum and success….
Tough decisions.
Lists of Pros and Cons won’t help you. Until you find the game changer.
And that is deciding who you want to be.
When you decide that – the aches becomes GOOD (you getting stronger) the good food feels like PRIDE (not resisting but choosing)
When it feels like, categorically unarguably, this is who you WANT to be.
Who you were supposed to be.
It’s all going to get 100 times easier.
And when you decide that – please get in touch.
We can help you get there quicker.
It might take you a while to decide and to weigh up the pros and cons the money and the childcare and all of that
That’s your call.
But when you do.
We’ll be here.
The space between the question to the impossible
problem,
and you deciding your answer…
is where you find out who you are.
Who you are going to be.
Who are you going to be?
Stay Gorgeous
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