They are all out to get you.
So I had a couple of conversations. Could’ve with messed with my mojo….
Someone said to a group of women:
“you want to watch HER (about someone not there) …..she’s a backstabber”
Another said: (about another woman)” oh I bet you were furious about what that ****** posted…I reckon it was about you!”
SIGH
Probably
Both really nice women.
Both actually meant well.
There was a time I would have given a flying ****.
Got involved.
I was SO argumentative, in your face, needed to right wrongs. Like some wannabe B^tch SuperHero. Embarrassing thinking about it….
I used to run a competition dance school.
We were really good, as it goes, lots of trophies and titles. Kids (as kids always are) were excellent.
Parents: variable in levels of madness/pleasantness/really really deranged psycho-ness.
Other Teachers: OH MY DAYS
One rival dance teacher, at a major event in front of a couple of thousand people, told me fairly loudly,that she was going to:
“put my stupid, smarmy, stuck up bleeping face, through a bleeping window”
She had been ‘relaxing’ in the bar for hours previously, while I was judging in a rather fabulous frock.
Which was nice. That kind of environment will make a girl come across a little stuck up…
(She didn’t, btw – stupid smarmy face perfectly intact she did however have an open-mouthed dribbling snooze during the pairs event.)
Paranoia.
Collusions, arguments,
Us against them…
Not very nice.
Pretty vile and anxious times, as well as the great bits.
And looking back, I realise I was as bad as any of them, in my own way.
Even though I didn’t bleeping bleep or dribble into my nice frock, or shriek like a fishwife, preferring passive aggression and quiet sarcasm….to wind her up more.
(‘Superior’ isn’t a very attractive look, with hindsight)
Not Proud.
Not Proud at all.
But now – years on, we all talk, get along, look back
and frankly realise what idiots we ALL were…..
We all had the same stresses lived similar lives, and actually we probably more alike (therefore likely to have been friends in other circumstances) than anyone else.
Same with the school gates.
I heard about one particularly ‘confrontational’ mum, who walks a complicated route to school, because she has fallen out with so many people and doesn’t want to see them on the school run. She always has an arch-nemesis or two.
That’s got to be a pain in the backside…
See the thing is I remember this sort of carry-on when my eldest daughter (24 this year) was at the infants. And all the mums from that time are ‘old friends’ now.
Any differences genuinely forgotten.
I just wanted to say that I have learned this. Not saying its the same for you But it is for me.
If you get wind that someone:
- Doesn’t like you
- Is a backstabber
- Is talking about you
- Is a bad mother
- Is insincere
- Tells lies
- Is only out for herself
- Is greedy
- Is a bully
- Is too flirty
- Is opinionated
and that you need to be on the right side
Then actually, caught on the wrong day from the wrong angle…. many of those things be about any of us.
Certainly me.
It may be that on my second litter of children I probably think more like a granny now… (certainly look more like one…..)
I worked out that
a: “Trust / Like / Help no-one” attitude
pretty much makes you miserable most of the time …every now and then you find out you were wrong, and you totally misjudge a cool person.
And a “Trust / Like / Help everyone” attitude
(i.e. most people are essentially ok no-one is perfect, and nice people balls-up sometimes)
pretty much makes you happy most of the time…every now and then you find out you were wrong and totally get taken for a ride by someone not so nice.
—————————————————————————
I would prefer to be happy most of the time and get let down occasionally than miserable most of the time and paranoid.
I’ll stick with the happy.
And yes it’s an internet meme, and often trotted out but what people think of you… Is their business.
If someone is nasty behind your back…that only makes them look bad.
Nastiness is generally, I have found, based in jealousy.
You HAVE to ignore that stuff.
Polite Silence, Rising above and GENUINELY not giving it any of your energy
(except maybe turning it into a hopefully helpful blog post 😉 )
wins 100% of the time.
if you bump into the 28 year old version of me could you mention that to her
Take it from your Gran.
Try a little down time with us… Power nap below
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