YOU DON’T NEED PERMISSION
I’m not sure about you staying in a hotel with all those men about.
Also I am not too happy about letting you spend family money on a jolly,
when we’ve got bills to pay.
I got a message recently, from an Inner Circle member with a dilemma
(she was happy I shared this – in fact she suggested it)
Essentially she wanted to go away on a fitness holiday (COOL!) with a group of women who go to a class she loves.
Collective noun ‘shriek’.
Basically, there are lots of different classes, the beach, pools and people socialise in the evening.
It’s been running for years – it’s bloody good
At the top of this post are her husband’s thoughts on the trip.
She asked what I think.
I said: You Don’t Require Permission.
If you are an adult and don’t live with your parents
(to be fair was still the case for my adult children on the odd occasion they came home for a while)
You don’t require permission to do the things you want to do.
You have to people do the things they want to do.
“Let me check with my husband / wife / significant other, that that’s OK”
…is one of the most soul-destroying sentences I think I hear.
And it’s one men, to their credit, seem to say a lot less than women do.
I totally get the ‘finding when is the most convenient, if it directly impacts them’ conversation.
Maybe if you have no particular preference of WHEN a thing happens and want to check that things fit well –
then you have the data.
Or if there is something you want to buy and find out whether there is an upcoming non-negotiable purchase you might wish you’d known about –
so you would have preferred to buy it at a different time.
But in the main – please internalise the fact that as a grown-ass woman –
you don’t require permission.
Here are some other things you don’t require permission for:
- Wearing what you want to
(unless you are at school/in prison/wear a work uniform).
This also applies to your age and gender. - What you eat or drink
(but this goes for them too. If you are a hardcore Vegan and they want to eat steak every night –
that’s none of your business either). - What you do/don’t do for a job
(money’s great – but if you are giving over a significant percentage of your actual life to doing something,
it has to be something you love doing. It has to.) - Having an opinion and voicing it when/where you want to.
- How you spend your time
- Who your friends are
But there is a price.
The price is that they may not like it, there might be consequences. Arguments. Hardships.
There might not.
And also it’s the same for them – they have that right too.
Operating like that gives the freedom, creativity and richness that makes two people become greater than the sum of their parts
(and with better things to talk about after sex than the latest box set on Netflix)
I would put money on that sex being better as well.
I think another important thing in relationships is to keep each other posted on what’s going on in your lives.
Discussion isn’t permission – it’s just intimacy and interestedness.
The fact remains:
If you want something – you do not require permission to try to get it.
You are already granted permission to live the life of your dreams.
It’s worth finding out how much you are prepared to pay.
Love Tanya & Claire xx
Also… if you are ready to fire on all cylinders?
To feel shinier and have all more fun?
Want to feel healthy and happy in your skin and carve out the perfect life FOR YOU
(not anyone else).
(sod anyone else)
If you’ve scrolled past enough memes and motivational quotes for a lifetime, and are thinking:
I’m READY IT’S MY TURN NOW I WANT A PIECE OF THE ACTION
Join us in our Inner Circle – click below! See you on the inside