In Human Upgrade today, we talked about what an amazing example it sets to do daily exercise.
The fact that children are home from school to see it – makes it better rather than worse.
That stuff goes in.
If you’ve got teeny children – you have got even more of a head-start with this – but it’s actually useful for all ages, and for most behaviours.
Let’s start with the bad news:
Children of smokers are twice as likely to smoke as their parents.
Even when the parents say
“filthy habit, I hate it – never do it, smoking is bad” (which is practically all of them).
Children of mothers who suffer from anxiety are actually THREE TIMES more likely to have anxiety disorders.
Even the parents who are kindly and skillfully hiding it from them.
I could go on(as you can imagine).
You don’t want to know the statistics for domestic violence, obesity and low mood.
Here’s the Important Part – and the Good News.
Children ultimately do what you show them.Not what you tell them.
They become what you model.
It goes into their hard-wiring.(We could do the brain-sciencey bit, but we’ll save that for a jollier email.)
So we’re going to be brutal with this next sentence – because it’s important.
Your children’s success
(by which we mean a happy, healthy fulfilled life)
has much less to do with which after-school clubs they go to,which theme parks you take them to,whether you have fancy holidays or whether they know all their phonics by five or get 10 GCSEs.
Your children’s happiness and health –
depends on yours.
That will be their default.
That’s what the subconscious mind does.
- If you prioritise yourself,
- treat yourself with kindness,
- do things that you are passionate about,
- make decisions based on your own happiness,
- be kind to your body,
- have fun,
- see friends,
- take time to relax and pamper yourself,
- be true to your own values,
- say no when you mean no,stay away from things that batter your confidence
- and do more of the things that lift you up…
Then that that is way more likely to be the way they will live their lives.
You thrive.They thrive.Win:Win
The science bears this out.It’s never too late to start.Today is the best day of all.
You want a child that eats healthy food as an adult?
You eat like that.
You want a child that has an active, well-exercised life?
You live that way.
You want your child to be happy?
Prioritise your happiness.
You want them to tell the truth?
Tell them the truth.
You want a child that has close, loving relationships?
Don’t stand for anything less for yourself.
Questions:
- Is there an aspect of your life that you really don’t want for your children?
- Can you think of a way to start addressing that?