Go to a Water Park
I take water parks as seriously as I take Theme Parks.
Which is very serious indeed.
You may not have considered this, but you don’t need to go to the waterpark with children.
I mean, you can – but you don’t need me to tell you that.
If you find yourself with a free weekday, seize the opportunity, take a friend, partner or even go solo and dive in.
It’s not weird to be an adult and whoo-hoo down a flume on a Tuesday lunchtime.
No one keeps track of who’s there – except for the lifeguards, who are only bothered with keeping everyone safe.
Carpe Diem.
I can’t even get philosophical about my love for water parks or find a life lesson about them, because I can’t concentrate on that.
Because WATER PARKS YAYYYY!
So instead can I just say this?
If you haven’t learned to swim, DO IT.
Get that sorted.
I didn’t learn to swim until I was 10 – mainly because my mother never learned to swim, so I’d never been taken.
1980s, parenting ranged from lax to non-existent, and, non-swimmer that I was – I took myself to the swimming baths with my 15p.
(And 5p for the locker).
I felt my way, hand-over-hand, along the edge – when a big scary swim instructor boomed at me:
“YOU BLOODY IDIOT”
for being in the deep end.
I kept returning, and by day 4/5, the scary swim instructor, rolling his eyes, made me join in with a beginner’s lesson.
Then, the intermediate one.
Looking back, I realise that I probably should have been paying for the lessons, but he must have taken pity on this scrawny, unaccompanied, feral little thing.
Within a few weeks, I was in the right lane of the pool (the faster swimmers) and got to be in races.
I was never amazing (Amy is amazing if you ever get to see her swim – watch, she’s like a dolphin, it’s quite ridiculous), but I was pretty good, and I’ve always managed to engineer my life to be in the pool fairly regularly.
The point is that I remember very clearly what it’s like not to be able to swim, and it isn’t good for your self-esteem.
It holds you back and stops you from having the sort of fun I get to have now at water parks without being worried.
Also, it could save a life and set an example.
I’m pretty sure I enjoy it more because of the memory of being unable to swim.
So, if that’s you, take this as a sign just to do it.
Believe me.
You’ll be so glad you did.
So today, I invite you to find your local (or maybe even not-so-local) waterpark. Here are the best ones in the UK in 2024
- Let’s Go Hydro Belfast: A huge inflatable playground, a floating cinema, and glamping options.
- Splashdown Poole: This water park in Dorset has 13 rides to choose from, ranging from mild to wild.
- Alton Towers Waterpark Stoke-on-Trent: This water park is part of the famous theme park and has a tropical theme with palm trees, waterfalls, and a lazy river.
- Sandcastle Waterpark Blackpool: This largest indoor water park in the UK has over 18 slides and attractions.
- Dorset Adventure Park: A slightly different take on a waterpark, this one has two lakes with inflatable obstacles, as well as a mud trail with swings, tunnels, and slides.
- Waterworld Staffordshire: This water park is one of the most popular in the UK, with over 30 rides and features.
- Subtropical Swimming Paradise in Center Parcs: Located in four Center Parcs resorts across the UK, this water park has a heated indoor pool with slides, rapids, and whirlpools.
- Twinlakes Family Theme Park Leicestershire: This water park is part of a family-friendly theme park and has a pirate-themed splash zone with fountains, jets, and tipping buckets.
- Aqua Parcs Milton Keynes: Another outdoor water park with an inflatable course on a lake.
- Alpamare Scarborough: This water park has four outdoor slides, two heated outdoor pools, an indoor wave pool, and a spa area.
And if none of those are near you, get on the Googles to find one that is.
Happy splashing!